Thursday, March 23, 2006

Except for you!

Didjya ever notice that there seems to be some fine print at the bottom of most signs that only certain people can read? These are the special people, the elite, those who are too busy or too important to be bothered with the kinds of restrictions and restraints which apply to the rest of us.

At least five times a day I walk past a door, propped open, with a sign clearing requesting, “Keep This Door Closed.” Apparently there is also a line underneath – one which I can’t see – which adds, “Except for you!” I pull the door shut behind me, only to pass it an hour later, wide open once again.

This secret invisible ink seems to be everywhere these days. We’ve all run across those with that special x-ray vision which enables them to see their special exemption at the bottom of all those signs (these people are also known as “Oblivions”). Signs such as:

Do Not Enter.” – except for you.

10 Items or Less” in the express lane – except for you.

One Per Customer” – except for you.

"No Parking" – except for you.

No Soliciting

No Trespassing

Please Take A Number

Please Turn Off Your Cell Phones

Thou Shalt Not...”

Did I miss any?