Thursday, January 12, 2006

This just in!

Hajj stampede kills hundreds
Bush blamed.

A spokesman for CAIR was quoted today as saying that responsibility for
this tragedy falls firmly on the shoulders of Pres. George W. Bush.

"Mr. Bush's continued persecution of people of Muslim faith through his personal worldwide jihad has led otherwise calm, rational muslims to be increasingly fervent in their devotions to Allah, leading to such frenzied supplications that normally mild-mannered devotees are, to coin a phrase, 'completely whigging out'."

"By subjecting the people of Islam to this unremitting climate of fear, the criminal George Bush is personally causing such frantic, panicked mob-like destruction. We cannot be held responsible for our own actions when are constantly in the grip of such fear, and are so blinded by desperation that we trample our own brothers in the throes of a terror which borders on madness."

"This blood will never be washed off the hands of the murderer George Bush.
These deaths at his hands must be avenged."

The White House has, to date, made no formal reply to these allegations.