Thursday, January 12, 2006

Observations on Life, Part Deux

  • When paying your five year old daughter her allowance, she'd much rather have 10 dimes than only one dollar.
  • Yes, apparently, the wet towel on the duvet cover really does matter that much.
  • White socks in the colored pile? Yup. That too.
  • I should, in all fairness, probably call my mother and ask her if I was really ever that annoying as an eight year old boy, before considering any further the idea of locking the Medium-Sized Child in a footlocker.
  • The wife can get all slobbery over Cuba Gooding, Jr., and I'm just supposed to laugh and roll with it, but let me bat an eye twice at Keira Knightley in blue face paint and a leather bandeau, and the Imperial Wife becomes the Ice Queen. Real. Damn. Quick.
  • A five year old child can take up more bed space than two grown adults.
  • Some five year olds snore.
  • Notice to women: Research has shown that there IS actually a point where no more dishes will fit into the dishwasher.