Thursday, April 21, 2005

This just in - Ghandi may very well have been a Hindu

Hot on the heals of the shocking revelation that the newly chosen head of the Catholic Church is, well Catholic, muckracking investigative media watchdogs have uncovered a string of what appear to be related instances of religous nepotism among spiritual leaders.

"This clearly smacks of conspiracy, I must say," opinied New York Times reporter Ima Haque. "If not a full blown conspiracy, then at least something disturbingly suggestive of a 'good ol' boy network' among past and present religious leaders. One can only imagine how far back this trend reaches!"

After an exhaustive search of ancient manuscripts, religious writings, census records, and back copies of Ms. Magazine, it has been revealed that not only is the Pope Catholic, but Joseph Smith was almost certainly "a Mormon," Mahatma Ghadi was in most people's estimation a "Hindu," and Ariel Sharon is, by most accounts, "probably Jewish." Also considered to be incontrovertible fact is the Prophet Mohammed's place as "The Revered Father of Most Holy Islam, Allah Be Praised!"

Other investigative journalists from such stalwart presses as the Washington Post, Slate magazine, and The Nation have postulated that further research will reveal that Hitler was German, Emperor Hirohito was "probably a Jap," and that a large percentage of African's brought to American during the slave years were "predominantly black."

The jury is still out as to whether Sen. Jim Jeffords is a Republican or a Democrat.

More as this story develops...